The wind is howling,
I stand in silence.
Ice is growing, deep within.
The cold is freezing my skin.
I've tried so hard to hold it in, but the wind is howling...
I must not give in.
Must stand my ground before the storm's eye.
Just another trial I've tried to deny.
Running does nothing, crying does less
Heavenly Father -
Hold me fast, for I do not know how long this storm will last.
I need your guidance, love and wisdom to help me be used for your Kingdom.
I don't want to fall down from your path, but I'm weak, fragile and lost without your hand.
Help me to be all that I am, by taking my soul in your hands.
4.2.15
A Call in the Storm
3.1.15
080014
The walls are getting thicker,
the fog is rolling in.
The way is becoming harder to feel, to know.
Is it?
Is it not?
So many things unknown, unseen-
Trust in You
You brought this path, and I took this oath that I
Would always do as you wished.
Here I am, wondering, fearing that i strayed off what you wanted and have become a lost beacon in the dark.
Standing in slow motion.
2.1.15
5 liner
When the moment comes,It goes just as fast with little left to ask.
A call in the void-
Whispers long forgotten...
But still, they are.
2.10.14
Walls Unmoving
Travel to futures, learn new things.
Tell me how without the cha-ching.
Wanting to be.
Wanting to see, what there is no longer applies to me.
I know what I want, where I want to go.
The path to it I'm afraid,
Does not show.
19.9.14
Freezing Heart
All the things I've run from,
Always catch me in the end.
Nothing left to stand on, in this ice cavern.
At long last my heart is frozen, left open-
Far too long.
Now my soul is numbing from the warmth given out.
Not much more can be felt, not enough to pull out.
Weakening walls soon they will crumble leaving nothing left, but the icicles creating death.
To be free is not what I want.
Only for the Frost-
To thaw.
15.9.14
Ariel
Held in so many things.
Lost one's own sanity.
Calling to the deep-
Want to return to the waves beneath.
No longer want feet.
Just want to be free
Want to laugh and move fast, forward to life.
No, one does not want to end with a knife.
28.1.14
Sacred Wish
Freedom and choice
My voice.
Living in the open,
to be who I am.
Never having to face the ridicule of man.
Always, me.
8.12.13
Flurry
Hoping to make sense of it later.
I open up, I drop it all, and hold myself somewhat tall.
Once, I held to the relief.
That I would never feel any
Lover's grief.
But there is no escape from such things.
I learned it all, and relive it now.
Time is short.
Time is naught.
Hold in the chaos.
Held the way-
Want to talk, gone in all the places,
And no where else.
22.5.13
True to Myself
It's all about what isn't.
I close my eyes, and hold it in.
Knowing it will only bleed out in the end.
How does one contain such a thing?
Causing misery all around, can't stop it though-
It's what I feel.
Can't fight it, I don't want to.
Take responsibility for my actions and I always will.
I need to express, I need to be-
To be heard, to share what makes me happy.
I can't hide it.
I can't deny it.
Oh, how I've tried, but it never works.
It suffocates, and stops my breathing. I can't think, and I can't keep it in.
This expression within me, this light-filled love I've felt,
I want to share it, I have to share it.
To not do so, stifles me, and thus it.
I know better, it is better to have than not to-
But to hold back...
I cannot do that.
I've done it for so long, it was a face I wore well-
It's not the same.
I'm not the same.
It must be let out,
I cannot hold it in.
I cannot hold it back.
I do not wish to,
Game or no game.
This is my heart's final say,
With holding it no longer-
I'm going to say what I want to say.
And there isn't a thing that can stop it.
Whether I want to or not.
Talk of such a feeling, will not be stopped.
15.5.13
Waves upon the sand
Stands a figure- all alone.
Just an echo in the dark,
That is all that has been its mark.
Insanity its only cloak-
Stabs into it with no remorse.
Leaving it choking on all it cannot be
Knows it cannot be
The shore is to the sea, as the sea is to the shore-
But the sea is defined by its waves.
And the waves are unrelenting in their ways.
Reminding the figure of the sea.
She belongs unto thee.
4.9.12
Reason's Blade
Telling me I'm dead.
Lost amidst the empty.
Ignorance is bliss,
Longing to shut them out.
I do not know how.
These voices always say-
Every single thing to make the memories
Never fade,
To scar, and bleed freely the wounds in my soul.
For how long?
Can I hold on?
To the sanity in me, and everything I hold dearly?
When such intruders want to take it all.
25.8.12
Sea's Bottom
All of which have always been a part-
Of something broken.
Of something wasted on time's fluid motion.
Just here.
Cannot feel.
Cannot see.
Broken, buried deeply.
Sea.
24.4.12
War
Stand the war
War of nothing at my door.
There are the flags of white raised up high-
But really it's just a disguise.
To take down the army with insidious charm.
Without a plea, without any surface malicious intent.
Still I can see it,
Still I grow weary of it.
Still it lingers, twisting and suffocating,
All that of which I know.
The war of silence, smiles, and lies.
11.4.12
Land
Nothing is more.
Green, green grass, and leaves-
Bright barked trees.
This is a world untouched.
Left in it's cool breeze,
Winter's hand brought no harsh winds to this land.
Mute
Will it fade away?
This growing darkness that holds me?
Sluggish ways, broken noise.
Behind closed doors-
See no more.
Don't want to,
Can't?
Won't?
Darkness here, darkness there.
Lost in anger, once tears.
Nothing to say.
No one to say it to anyway.
Darkness
Darkness
Empty
Void
Not another string of words-
String that means the same old thing.
Nothing
Nothing all is and all should.
Nothing nothing.
Muted.
23.3.12
Demise
You won't see.
The red in my eyes.
Your demise.
So twisted up in your own lies.
You'll never see.
I've thrown your heart away from me.
Killing isn't my thing-
No never was.
But shards of diamond glass are starting to
Entrance me, with the idea of your lifeless body covered in them.
Red in my eyes.
Your demise,
Ignorant fool.
Good Bye, is that what you want?
Good, I'll gladly leave your selfish
Existence to rot.
Steal that light back,
Steal your life.
Beautiful demise, my dear.
21.3.12
Kinship
Kinship long deserted, never to return-
Never to leave.
Always still.
Loyalty to no one, loyalty to all.
Falling over and over,
Knees bleeding and arms shaking.
Cold-
So cold.
Nothing left, everything left.
Frozen in the moment that never ends.
'Round and 'Round it goes.
They must go, never moving,
Never stopping.
Infinite development.
Infinite lies.
Severed ties,
Murdering times.
Rhyme, oh rhyme
Where hath thy gone?
26.2.12
Manic
Yet here I am stuck in between both.
Like a common fool unable to admit defeat-
Never defeat, never no not me
I will prevail in what I know is truth.
The lies, the wenches,
They can’t be bothered to give me the boot-
Out of my mind
So out of time
Can’t even fucking rhyme, in the ways I do to pass time
Just a beat in my head-
Tick tock.
Witch is , is what? A flame
Who is to blame?
The bitch who has no name.
Me dumbass.
20.12.11
Forest
Try to breakthrough them-
Change them.
It never works.
Some forest-filled terrain is what a heart is in this state.
Too many twists and turns,
Won't make it through-
Fall into a ditch-
Set back,
Going back
To the middle quiet.
Nothing else.